Oddest. Trip. Ever.

So, Peter and I are in Baltimore (Jessup, actually), Md. He never, poor boy, got a birthday party this year. I tried to get him to have a pool party this summer, but he didn't want to.

What he DID want was to go to an Orioles game. So, our compromise was that he and I would take a road trip to Balitmore for an O's game.

We were going to go over Labor Day, but life got crazy, and then I saw that THIS weekend, the O's were playing.....

The Red Sox.

Now, Peter likes the O's just fine. But he LOVES the Red Sox, so this was a no brainer.

Grace and I had plans last night, plus Peter had a soccer game this morning (lost, 4-3, but Peter scored all three goals), so this is truly a zippy little trip.

We left Chapel Hill today about 2:30; it should've taken us about 5, 5.5 hours to get here. So, yeah, it was conceivable that we could've gotten here about 7:30, and possibly even run up to the Inner Harbor for dinner.

But no. This is THE. MOST. SURREAL. TRIP. EVER.

It started with Peter's lunch (I, sensibly, ate at home. He wanted Bojangles at 3pm). I ordered his lunch, and then asked for a jelly biscuit for me. The drive-through woman replies, "A what????" Me: "Uh, a jelly biscuit." Her: "You want a biscuit? With Jelly????" Me: "Yes!"

I dunno, I know Southerners are inherently different, but dang, is a jelly biscuit really that odd?

So, then we head off. Nothing major for awhile; we listened to the radio, Peter did some homework, etc. We were making good time, and were on trace for dinner in Baltimore.

Then, a road info sign (immediatly AFTER an exit) informed us that there was a major accident ahead, ALL lanes were closed, and we were to follow the detour signs.

An hour later, we had made it a mile down the road to the exit (no signs). We exited, and immediately (well, 10 minutes later when we'd made it off the ramp) ran into THE MOST OBNOXIOUS OLD MAN IN THE WORLD!!! Seriously. Firt of all, it was obvious that EVERYONE was getting off I-95. Most people were nicely alternate-merging. The cars in front of me, both in my lane and Mr. Obnoxious-oid's lane, did that.

But, no. Not Mr. Obnoxo. Luckily, I'm driving the Veracruz (for the GPS), so I made him let me in! Nearly as soon as I got on the road, though, I heard a siren -- one of ambulences from the accident was trying to get down the off-ramp. Again, most of us nice, cooperative drivers pulled over to let the ambulence by.

Not Mr. Obnoxo. Nope, he PASSED ME! Arrogant, sore-loser, unfriendly, obnoxious little so-and-so stinking PASSED ME. And then got ticked because there was no room for him to pull over when the ambulence was behind him honking, loudly for him to GET OUT OF THE WAY.

Well, my patience was, um, strained. Quite frankly, I lost it. I don't THINK Peter learned any new words (OK, one) but he certainly learned some new combinations.

But, we eventually got back on the highway. We headed North (again), stopping for dinner north of Richmond at a place that said it had the best milkshakes in Richmond (it did, and a yummy veggie plate, too! And GREAT biscuits, and even JELLY!)

Then we were off again, but alas, it was STILL not to be a normal trip. We drive and drive, and I'm trustingly following the GPS...which sent us on 395 around DC. Now, 395 is scenic -- we got to see the Washington Monument, Lincoln and Jefferson memorials, and the Capitol.

But it's not the best way to go. It took for-stinkin'-ever, and we went through some lovely sections of town! AND a "parkway", with a 55mph speed limit. Now, I'm all for safety, but dang, people, 55 mph when I just want my nice hotel bed is just mean.

But, we're here now, in Jessup, in our hotel. Where there are a bunch of college kids here for a marching band convention.

Oh, and when I ran to the gas station next door to get chapstick, there was a frat-boy type (i.e. drunk and in khakis, an oxford shirt and tie), trying to buy coffee cups. Not a package of styrofoam cups, mind you; the ones that the gas station uses to sell coffee! The clerk was telling him to put them back, they weren't for sale, but he didn't seem to be listening!

But Man vs. Food is eathing the worlds spiciest burger, I have my chapstick, and tomorrow we get to see the Red Sox!!!!